Spend Wisely...

So in this new season I've entered one thing has become increasingly clear: my resources are limited. And so are yours.

I remember being a kid and feeling like all the time and resources in the world were at my disposal. And they were. But as I've grown, I've come to realize this no longer holds true. So while we ought to always be wise as to where we invest our time, efforts and money. So too, we should be wise and choosy as to with whom we spend our time and efforts.

I had second thoughts about writing this, because in my heart of hearts I am an ardent advocate of love God and love people. But I've also come to realize that loving people includes yourself. In fact, in Ephesians men are called to love their wives just how they love themselves. The problem, I think, is that many times, men don't love themselves. They are incomplete, unwhole, broken. And out of that lack they attempt to love a woman and instead they end up trying to make that woman a substitute for the lack in their lives. And so too, do women. Anyways, point is this: if you're not complete, whole and unbroken; how can you expect to give any of yourself to anyone? Friends, family, lovers, whatever.

So in that I've recently become a pretty big fan of myself. I don't mean for this to come across as conceited or arrogant. But I mean, I've become a better steward of my resources. Namely, my time and energy. You see, while we are called to be light to this world and bring Christ to people and people to Christ. You're also to be a steward of you. So be choosy who you spend time with. Rev. Run (RunDMC) said this: "practice loving everyone, but be careful who you surround yourself with--apples hang with apples." And I think it holds water, love on everyone. Be Christ to everyone at all times. Don't be a jerk. Ever. To anyone. As much as you can help it. Lol. Apologize when you fail. But choose carefully who you invest most of your time and energy with. Those people will either build you up or tear you down. Don't feel bad for letting people exit your life when they've become more taxing on your time, resources, sanity, emotions than what they pour back into you. In fact, if you have to force yourself on someone, you should really ask yourself, does this person even merit this much time and emotion? Relationships (friendships, family or otherwise) are a two-way road. If you're doing all the chasing, all the calling and all the vying for attention. What is your return on investment? It's ok to let people exit your life. If people are really interested in your life and well-being they'll find time and effort to pour into you. And at the end of the day those are really the people you want in your life. People that on some level, make you and your life a priority. Because as much as people may 'have your back' it does you no good to rely on those people just to turn around and find out that they peaced-out when 'having your back' was no longer convenient.

This isn't a green light to axe people from your life without some sort of effort to find a common ground. But guard yourself. Guard your heart. Not everyone that claims to 'have your back' or be about you really does or is. And on the flip side of that, enjoy, appreciate, honor those that stick around when you're not at your best. Those that have seen you at your lowest and still love and respect you. People will come and go. Seek wisdom in your relationships with people. Sometimes, you'll have to release people to their destiny--which may have nothing to do with you and other times, you'll have to man up and hash out issues to keep things going. But if you ever feel like your forcing yourself on someone. Don't. Find people that love you, people that are about you, people that will balance you out, but will encourage you. And hold on to those people for dear life. And realize others are simply there for a season.

Father,

Thank you for the people in my life. I never, ever feel like I deserve them, but by your grace you've surrounded me with some world-class friends and family. And while you've taken me through different seasons where you allowed people to exit my life and I'm sure there will be more, help me to always lean on you for my peace, my security, my sanity and my comfort. I love you Father. You're amazing to me and you give me more than I deserve.