Cash N Go...

When I was in High School I used to work at the Clay Madsen Rec Center which had pay days every other Friday. I normally wouldn't get off til about 6:30-7ish, well after my bank had closed shop til Monday. So if I wanted any spending cash for that Friday and the weekend I had to always cash my checks at this seedy little gas station that had a Cash N Go or QuickCash or MoneyCash or whatever it was called (these places always seem to have some convenient name with the word 'Cash' in there somewhere) and wait til Monday to deposit into my real bank. This was back in the days before direct deposit was common place. After some time the nice gentleman of Arab-descent that ran the Cash place knew me pretty well. Although the first few times it was quite an ordeal, I had to show my Driver's License, Social Security Card, take a digital thumb print, take a mugshot, provide a phone number, mom's maiden name, dog's name, secret fear, deodorant type, etc. But once Mr. (I forgot his name) knew me, it was pretty painless, show up, cash my check, buy some gum or Mexican candy, make small talk and enjoy the weekend. After I graduated I got more or less a 'real' job and discovered the beauty of direct deposit, so I saw Mr. Arab-descent less and less. If I happened to be in the area, I might stop by for gum or Mexican candy or gas. After even more time, I just happened to frequent the area less and less. I can't tell you honestly the last time I stepped foot in the one-stop shop, although I drive by it about once every six months and get a little nostalgic. If I had to cash anything there I'm sure I would have to go through the initial interrogation process all over again.

Many times it seems we (err, I, but to diffuse my own guilt, I'll group any of you reading this into this category) treat our friends this way, isn't it? We go through these seasons where we pour and pour into each other. Call each other, hang out, go to lunch, dollar movies, encourage each other, pray for each other, speak life into each other, etc. What some shrinks might call make 'emotional deposits' into each other. And we get pretty close. We get to know each other and have no problem being buddies. Sometimes we keep these friends around for a really long time. But sometimes, as it happens in my life, these deposits into people around me tend to dry up. In fact, it's like sometimes I start to draw more out of people than I deposit. If you've been around me for any amount of time, you know I'm not always the most patient or lenient person when it comes to certain things. Don't touch my food. So I sometimes make some withdrawals from our 'emotional bank.' And little by little we deplete our deposits into our friends and it's like we hurt our credit score with people.


It's my experience that many times, these withdrawals are unintentional and many times almost innocent oversights. The scenario in my life tends to play out something like this: friend A expects Y from friend B (usually me) either through inferred communication or an explicit expectation -Hey are we still good for Tuesday? -You got it!. Friend B is a knucklehead that doesn't realize or overlooks the expectations that friend A has and friend A is let down. Withdrawal. Let's be real, as friends there are certain expectations and standards we have of one another. After all, isn't that why we allow people in our world to be more than just acquaintances? I strongly believe the difference between an acquaintance and a close friend is the level with which you can trust someone with your heart and your life. If someone can't be trusted to steward a small part of your heart, life and feelings, how much can you trust them to be a friend? After enough of these withdrawals or maybe just one huge withdrawal or even just lack of deposits, Friend B has a less than positive credit score with Friend A. Soon enough Friend B will try to make a withdrawal and realize that Friend A is no longer extending a credit line to Friend B. Familiar? No? Maybe just my world.

Here's what I'm getting at: as people, we have certain expectations from each other. Especially as friends. I would encourage you to try to live up to those expectations, especially if you set them, but nonetheless live up to them. If I tell you that you're a great friend of mine, you should expect for me to carve out some time for me to hang out with you. If you matter to me, expect for me to make you a priority in my life. If your feelings are important to me, expect for me to not be a jerk to you. If I'm interested in your life, expect for me to inquire about your world. A lot of times I don't do these things. Not that we are to live our lives with the focus of pleasing people, but we are called to be people of integrity. We're called to love God and love each other. Many times, I drop the ball on this. If I've ever set expectations for you or in your world that I failed to live up to, I'm sorry. If I've ever had less than stellar credit in your world, I'm sorry. I admire, appreciate and love all the friends in my life and I know how much it sucks to be let down and to be disappointed. If I've ever made you feel like this, please forgive me.


³⁴ But I say, do not make any vows! Do not say, ‘By heaven!’ because heaven is God’s throne. ³⁵ And do not say, ‘By the earth!’ because the earth is his footstool. And do not say, ‘By Jerusalem!’ for Jerusalem is the city of the great King. ³⁶ Do not even say, ‘By my head!’ for you can’t turn one hair white or black. ³⁷ Just say a simple, ‘Yes, I will,’ or ‘No, I won’t.’ Anything beyond this is from the evil one.
Matthew 5:33-37 NLT